Friday, June 03, 2005

Grovelers, Hypocrites, and Civil Libertarians

Charles Krauthammer's daily minimum dose of Kool-Aid in today's Washington Post is an artful blast at Gitmo apologists. Did he miss a single trick from the Karl Rove playbook? Let's see...

"Grovel" and "enough already" in the title. "Self flagellation" is there. "Run and hide," good. "Self flagellation" a second time, excellent. "Inflammatory allegations." You go, Krautster!

I really like this:

"Moreover, what were the Korans doing there in the first place? The very possibility of mishandling Korans arose because we gave them to each prisoner. What kind of crazy tolerance is this?"

That's telling them, Chazman. We wouldn't have been cast as bad guys if we hadn't been such good guys in the first place. What were we thinking, being tolerant like that? Almost un-American, wasn't it?

And this is masterful:

"Even greater hypocrisy is to be found here at home. Civil libertarians, who have been dogged in making sure that FBI-collected Guantanamo allegations are released to the world, seem exquisitely sensitive to mistreatment of the Koran. A rather selective scrupulousness. When an American puts a crucifix in a jar of urine and places it in a museum, civil libertarians rise immediately to defend it as free speech. And when someone makes a painting of the Virgin Mary, smears it with elephant dung and adorns it with porn, not only is that free speech, it is art--deserving of taxpayer funding and an ACLU brief supporting the Brooklyn Museum when the mayor freezes its taxpayer subsidy."

Chucky, how'd you manage to clump "hypocrisy" with civil libertarians, the FBI, Newsweek, tax subsidies for art, pornography, and the ACLU all in one paragraph? And pandering to the Christian right to boot! Wow. I'm in total awe.

Ooh, check out that grand finale:

"Get over it," "stop whimpering," "start defending ourselves."

Outstanding job overall, Krautmeister. Just one thing; you left out "hand wringing."

Try to do better next time, okay?



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